My Bio-sphere

So I'm back on my feet again after about five days of illness.

Except for a brief walk to our nearby beach park for some much needed sunshine, I've been in the house. I'm bored stiff, but I know not to push myself. I still have to rest every three hours. Ugh.

Thoughts of my recent boredom lead me to ponder something I encountered several times over the last few weeks...

I was a contributing writer for a few local magazines recently and the editors asked me to write a brief bio. I also had to write a bio for my new Mom blog at OCMoms.

[Insert deer in headlights gaze here]. Honestly, there's no worse writing assignment than having to write about myself. I sit and stare at the blank screen pondering what it is that I exactly do from sun up to sundown every day. What makes me interesting? It's enough to evoke a sort of quasi mid-life crisis.

I enjoy my life. I keep busy doing those things that I enjoy, but I'm not sure how interesting they are to read about. This is what I love to do - write. It's the reason I'm in these magazines in the first place. The books I read are about how to write better. I read magazines to spark ideas for other stories. I circle my favorite words in magazines, and I make lists of words I want to use in future articles. I am, in short, a nerd.

The stuff that I used to identify with was a long time ago, I feel like. Before kids, or when I was in my 20s. Much of that is either stale to me now, too expensive, or there's simply no time.

Does my life now read like some kind of stereotypical personal ad? I enjoy walking on the beach. I stay busy being a mom to my kids. I write. I struggle to keep my house clean. I love hanging out with my girlfriends when I can. I miss my family. I enjoy shopping when I can. I want to really believe in something again.

It's sparked a desire to fulfill those things I want to achieve - like my music, which is at a current stand still, again. And my book, which I've only written one chapter of so far.

I want to live a fuller life. I want to embrace each day for the potential it offers me. And I want to know I didn't shortchange myself at all.

(Photo by my sis, Rebecca Wilkins)